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Dr. I: Sometimes, nothing says it better than profanity

Idle Thoughts, while waiting for the NFL schedule, the Celtics to guard somebody and for global warming to give us May weather:

• Dr. Idle, Dr. I to his close friends, will likely offend a few Puritans with this observation:

Sometimes, nothing says it better than profanity.

Sure, Yankee fans were R-rated the other night in their derision of Cheating Jose Altuve. But it just felt right. Much like the way David Ortiz responded to the Boston Marathon bombing over the public address system at Fenway with, "This is our bleeping city."

Somehow, "bleep Altuve" worked better than "your mother should have thrown you away and kept the stork."

• OK. It's certainly interesting that Bill Murray's son is a UConn men's basketball assistant coach and that Mad Dog Russo's son will be one of Dan Hurley's graduate assistants next year.

But ol' Dr.  I isn't going to start breathing into a brown paper bag until Hurley finds somebody who can make a shot outside 15 feet.

• Hope you don't think this University of Hartford business is over.

Stay tuned.

• Congrats to Tamika (Williams) Jeter, the new head women's basketball coach at Div. III Wittenberg in Ohio.

Loved her at UConn. First-rate person. First-rate interview subject. First-rate sense of humor.

• Proud Dr. I moment: He heard some ESPN dweeb refer to "expected batting average" the other night and changed the channel immediately.

• Question of the week on Twitter: "What if Stacy's mom is Jesse's Girl and her number is 867-5309?"

• Dr. I demands raises for Coast Guard basketball coaches Kevin Jaskiewcz and Alex Ivansheck.

They coached their teams to undefeated seasons this past winter, you know.

• And while we're at CGA, how about we get all the banners back on the wall in the gym before Biden's visit?

• Read this in the New York Post recently: "Gleyber Torres' chase contact has decreased to 16.3 percent from last year's 20.1 percent. His average exit velocity had dropped from 88.6 to 83.6, despite his barrel percentage more than doubling, from 3.7 percent to 7.5 percent."

Dr. I was about to say something snide. But then, it's that kind of drivel that got Chili Davis fired.

• Dr. I reiterates a bucket list item: to crash the cymbals during the Star Spangled Banner.

You know: "O say can you see (crash) by the dawn's early light (crash)."

Who's going to make that happen?

• Dr. I's second bucket list item: To be alive when somebody belches (or worse) inside Butler Cabin during Jim Nantz's sacred interview time.

• Dr. I laughed out loud the other day hearing John Sterling's home run call for Roughie Odor for the first time: "Je t'adore, Odor!"

• Is anyone else but Dr. I having trouble discussing Jayson Tatum and Larry Bird in the same sentence?

• Do you think people named Simon are more inclined to speak in the third person? Think about it: What would a bartender do if a guy named Simon walked in and said, "Simon says make me a vodka tonic."

• It's not like Dr. I to condone violence. (Much). But he's going to watch the NHL playoffs just to see someone pound the tar out of Tom Wilson.

• Congrats to D.J. Exum, the new head boys' basketball coach at Ledyard. Covered D.J. as a player at New London. Big time personality, really good guy. Excellent hire by Ledyard assistant principal/athletic director Jim Buonocore.

• Finally ... a happy Mother's Day to all you mothers out there.

This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro

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